Cadaver of Truth

You think I am wasted. He thinks I’m wasted. She thinks I’m wasted.
Even my cheap 2 bucks worthy cigarettes think I’m wasted.
Well, I am not wasted.
Because I know the truth you have been hiding from.
I manicure the claws of the darkness.
I repeal the lies of life you live within to find happiness.
Come, face your skeleton-old disease.
Cry, ‘cause there’s no mercy; twisted tales of humans remain.
Smile, ‘cause I give you the chance to enjoy the last show.
Fear, ‘cause I know something you don’t know. You will NEVER know.

This fairytale has gone bad!

"We can’t cry the pain away
We can’t find a need to stay
I slowly realized there’s nothing on our side..."

And once again I have fucked it all up…….
The awesome ME.

Today was the worst of all these days… Had pissed a person I loved at the midnight, missed tuition at morning, went to the suckiest college departmental fresher’s welcome party, went to another tuition, got home fucked up and slept all the evening.
Every time I think that life’s gonna change, it gets stuck and makes me wanna throw up because of that old smell of misery.
I’m lonely again. Better to say, I realized I’m lonely as every-single-fucking-thing has been just a pretention.
I love my friends, I do. But at the end of the day I can’t breathe easy. And there’s nothing I can do about it.
I know I’m gonna survive, by tears or by strength, I will.
But I don’t wanna die inside like this.

All I want is… someone to put the hand on my shoulder and make me feel life’s worth living.

I wish I were invisible.
I wish I could be like THEM.
I wish I were a heartless bitch.
I wish I could die without pain.
I wish.

No, not suicidal much. Just a lil unwell.